The Season is Upon Us

The winter where I live has absolutely sucked ass. We had more snowfall than the northern ski areas, literally. Roads were reduced to pinball chutes by the looming walls of snow. So much sand was thrown down that most roads looked like back country packed-dirt driveways. Plus, don’t forget about the frost heaves, a Southern New England staple. These problems though, they’re all solvable by warmer weather. Snow melts, street sweepers pick up the sand, and even frost heaves start to settle back down somewhat. The biggest problem we’re facing are potholes.

There are more potholes around this year than I have seen over the past 3 years combined. The roads around here were never the best paved roads to start with. Hell, there’s even roads around that have more hot patch than true asphalt. Repave ’em? Nah, the DOT has to keep busy between coffee breaks somehow. With some of these potholes big enough to hide a helmet in, I decided to make use of the nice weather we had this past Saturday and reconnoiter some of my favorite roads.

I’ve spent the past couple of years mapping out some routes that are bike friendly. Straight, smooth, few stop signs, and even fewer cracks/potholes are key. So, before I start planning any long rides I wanted to see if my routes were still viable.

Went out, rode, roads look surprisingly good, end of story. Abrupt ending, huh? Well, hold on a second there, killer. I’m two miles from where I parked a guy starts backing out of his driveway with a very large piece of pvc pipe of top of his truck roof. He sees me and stops, but the pipe is sticking out far enough that I needed to give it a little extra space. Seeing this, I slide over two to three feet and seconds later I hear a horn blaring at me. Well, here comes this motherfucker in a Dodge pickup truck swinging past me on the other side of the road to pass me out. And what’s 15 yards ahead of me? A FUCKING STOP SIGN!!! So I decided to let him know how I felt as he was passing me by prominently showing him my left middle finger and yelling “FUCK YOU!!!” I then proceeded to chase him down to pass him out at the stop sign. I wanted to show him my right middle finger and tell him, “GO FUCK YOURSELF!!!”

Motherfucking cocksucking asshole. I hope he gets cancer of the dick hole and he can’t piss anymore and then he has to get a colostomy bag and he spills it all over himself when he walks in on me eating the dinner his wife cooked for me. Hahaha, fuckin’ asshole.


Wicked nut punch

Wicked nut punch

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